Why yes, I am going to eat these cheese fries.

In general, I am a very happy person. My hope is that my loved ones can find this in their lives as well. I see people focusing far too much on what money can buy, what foods they do or do not consume, and things that matter far less than family and personal growth. I see those I love drinking alcohol to the extent that they embarrass themselves and their families, partaking of drugs to the extent that they neglect their children and burden their parents, and spend money they don't have causing unnecessary distress.

There are things about me that I would love to change. I don't like that I've gained back all the weight I lost while going through chemo, but it is better than being chemo-weak, and I have a boyfriend who loves every bit of me. By the way, women, most men can't tell the difference when you gain or lose 10 lbs, so stop stressing so much about it. The only person who notices or cares is you and if you care that much about 10 lbs, you have other issue that you should take care of. For some people it is about control or vanity, both of which can be very dangerous for you, and for your loved ones. If you have children, realize that this is going to give them a skewed sense of what is important and can lead to eating disorders for them.

This weekend I will be praying much and asking to know what I need to change about myself, and for the skills to be able to do so. While I do realize that we need to take care of our bodies, I am fairly certain that my prayers won't be answered with "Tracy, you could stand to lose some of the weight you have packed on recently". After all, this body is temporary, but my consciousness/personality/character will be going with me when I leave this world.