Tomorrow the IV that is pumping minute amounts of chemo into my system every 10 minutes will be removed. I would rather go in and have chemo administered every day than this. For one thing, it is a constant reminder that I have cancer, and that something toxic is going into my body every few minutes. Also, It is a pain having an IV line. The fanny pack is easier than a standard IV pole, but still a pain. It is difficult to sleep in the same position every night too. And I worry that I will pull the IV out in my sleep, which I haven't, although one night I spilled water and jumped up quickly to clean it up and just about pulled it out. That was not pleasant!
I am not having the usual said effects from the chemo (yet?) but I am looking pretty ill. My face is yellow and I just plain don't look healthy. Tomorrow afternoon the pump will be off, and even though the chemicals will still be in my body, I will be able to move around more and feel like I have some freedom back.
I am down to 155 lbs. Which isn't tiny, but I started at 190 just 3 months ago. I ate as much as I could in between chemos, but still lost weight. I hope to be able to eat enough to keep my body healthy throughout the rest of treatment.